Hesitation is the kiss of death
It took me almost three years. I read everything I could find on the subject of change, happiness, habits, motivation, and human behavior. I read social science experiments, happiness research, books on the brain, and neuroscience studies. I didn't limit my research to the "experts;" I sent questionnaires to everyday people, like you and me, who were using the Rule. Then I got on the phone, Skype, and Google Chat, and dug into the step-by-step experiences of what someone faces the moment they choose to change. As I deconstructed the moment of change, I uncovered something fundamental about how each and every one of us is wired. Right before we're about to do something that feels difficult, scary, or uncertain, we hesitate.
Hesitation is the kiss of death. You might hesitate for just a nanosecond, but that's all it takes. That one small hesitation triggers a mental system that's designed to stop you. And it happens in less than—you guessed it—five seconds. Ever notice how fast fear and self-doubt take over your head and you start making up excuses for why you shouldn't say something or do something? We hold ourselves back in the smallest, most mundane moments every day, and that im-pads everything. If you break this habit of hesitating and you find the courage to "take some kind of action," you'll be astonished by how fast your life changes.
Yet, certainly, the wise learn many things from their enemies; for caution preserves all things. From a friend you could not learn this, but your foe immediately obliges you to learn it. For example, the states have learned from enemies, and not from friends, to build lofty walls, and to possess ships of war. And this lesson preserves children, house, and possessions.
The present theory then must be considered to be a suggested program or framework for future research and must stand ...
It’s saying no.
That’s your first hint that something’s alive. It says no. That’s how you know a baby is starting to turn into a person. They run around saying no all day, throwing their aliveness at everything to see what it’ll stick to. You can’t say no if you don’t have desires and opinions and wants of your own. You wouldn’t even want to.
No is the heart of thinking.