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Shame needs to be told

Shame needs to be told Shame needs to be told
Source: artist unknown via Pinterest
The Gifts of Imperfection
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The Gifts of Imperfection
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When the shame winds are whipping all around me, it's almost impossible to mold on to any perspective or to recall anything good about myself. I went right into he bad self-talk of God, I'm such an idiot. Why did I do that? The greatest gift of having done this work (the research and the personal work) is that I can recognize shame when it's happening. First, I know my physical symptoms of shame—the dry mouth, time slowing down, tunnel vision, hot face, racing heart. I know that playing the painful slow-motion reel over and over in my head is a warning sign. I also know that the very best thing to do when this is happening feels totally counterintuitive: Practice courage and reach out! We have to own our story and share it with someone who has earned the right to hear it, someone whom we can count on to respond with compassion. We need courage, compassion, and connection. ASAP.

Shame hates it when we reach out and tell our story. It hates having words wrapped around it—it can't survive being shared. Shame loves secrecy. The most dangerous thing to do after a shaming experience is hide or bury our story. When we bury our story, the shame metastasizes.

Shame corrodes the very part of us that believes that we are capable of change.

By jasjeetahlowalia | 22/06/2020

The best way out is to move beyond categorization of results. Something is 'right' but maybe tomorrow you wish you did the other thing.to embrace ur actions is all that needs to be done. All is u, even that was u, so what.

By nit1911qwerty | 12/06/2020

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